Musings on Grace
By Anna Jane Friess
When I was asked to write a Weekly Update article about where I see God’s grace, I was unsure what I wanted to share. I could come up with a parenting anecdote or a heartwarming story about my marriage. Often stories about God’s grace seem to revolve around encountering an obstacle but finding that in the end things turn out in my favor. The problem is, that’s not what grace looks like to me right now. I just don’t have it in me to fit God’s grace into a neat little feel-good box and top it with a bow.
I don’t say this because I doubt God’s grace, I know that God’s grace is everywhere. I believe that grace and truth came through Jesus Christ (John 1:17). I know that it is by grace that I have been saved (Ephesians 2:8), and that because of grace, sin now has no dominion over me (Romans 6:14). His grace is sufficient for me, for his power is made perfect in my weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).
I see grace everywhere, but I struggle to neatly encapsulate it because what I see God doing all around me hasn’t been neat at all. Lately in my life Jesus has been more of a lion than a lamb…a little more of a sword-wielding rider on a white horse than a soft-spoken Galilean teacher…more likely to cause shock by turning over some tables than to spark joy by providing a miraculous healing.
To me lately God’s grace has been hard conversations. It’s been confrontations, changes, and struggles. It’s been watching people make bad choices. It’s been mourning with those who mourn. I’ve spent more time wondering what God is up to than I’ve spent knowing what He’s up to.
And I’m honestly ok with that. In the midst of what sometimes feels chaotic, I have the peace of knowing that I am as immersed in God’s grace as I am in the air that I breathe. I don’t mean to say that God’s grace is present in spite of difficulties, but rather that it is present in the difficulties. How can God’s grace take the form of things that cause pain? I don’t know exactly, but I know that He works all things for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). I also know the truth of my sin: what I deserve is a life far less comfortable than this. What I deserve is hell.
Instead, God has gifted me this beautiful life with the craziness of this ministry-heavy season. He’s given me opportunities to serve, opportunities to grow, frustration, tears, crumbs on the floor, meetings, hands that need to be held, words that need to be said, kids to disciple, a husband to support, people to love, and laundry to wash and dry (and then shove into the drawers in a semi-folded fashion because I gotta cut corners somewhere!). And yes, He has given me grace; grace to continue, grace to know peace, and grace to trust that the One who knows the number of hairs on my head is up to something good.
